Scroll to see the newest member of the endangered species list

Siberian Tiger

Habitat: Russian Far East

Panda

Habitat: Southwestern China

Polar Bear

Habitat: Arctic Circle

Orangutan

Habitat: Indonesia and Malaysia

Middle Aged White Male

Habitat: United States of America

Looks Like Testimony To Me.

Something has always bothered me about the O.J. Simpson murder trial.  He asserted his Fifth Amendment Right against self-incrimination and refused to take the stand.  If a defendant does not “take the Fifth” he is open to cross examination.  When Simpson’s attorneys asked him stand up before the jury and try on the gloves he mugged and acted as though he was struggling.  Is seems to me that even though no words were spoken by Simpson and he was not physically “on the stand” his actions amounted to testimony.  I believe that when Simpson left his seat at the defendants table and “tried on” the gloves he effectively waived his Fifth Amendment right.  The Prosecution should have been all over that especially since the verdict was based on “if the glove don’t fit you must acquit.”  Tsk tsk Marsha Clark.

LOOKS LIKE TESTIMONY TO ME.

 

 

Testimony From The Trouble Makers

 

 

 The federal government once again has considered legislating against cartoon characters .  Somehow the fine men and women of congress have made a connection between Captain Crunch and children overeating…and listening to Justin Beiber causes acne…and listening to Barbra Streisand causes arthritis.  Excuse me while I delete my Babs and download some Beebs.

Who’s Your Momma?

Obama’s first term is headed toward the final lap.  What is remarkable is how little he has been able to get done while in the White House.  He was elected with great hopes of change.  He entered office with a list of promises to fix what was broken.  Unfortunately the list has not gotten shorter. The unpopular war continues and the bad economy gets worse.  The main reason he has failed is that he cannot get the congress to back him on his agenda.  When it comes to congress Obama is like the mom who wants to be the Popular Mom and it hasn’t been working.  Maybe he should be more like the Tiger Mom.

These Idiots. I Say Let’s Regulate Them.

Standard and Poor’s is at it again, reeking chaos on the level of Thing One and Thing Two.  They have lowered the credit rating of the United States.  According to the Washington Post, the effect of the downgrade “…could push up borrowing costs for the U.S. government, costing taxpayers tens of billions of dollars a year. It could also drive up interest rates for consumers and companies seeking mortgages, credit cards and business loans. “

The people of our nation have struggled long enough with an economy that is on the brink.  Curious thing though, the economy was put on the brink in part by overvalued sub-prime mortgage-backed securities.  And who was responsible for the overrating these mortgage-backed securities…that’s right Standard and Poor’s.

WEINER APPARENTLY MISSED AN IMPORTANT SECOND GRADE LESSON.

When I was in second grade I learned a most valuable lesson.  We were rehearsing for the winter sing when our music teacher gave us some pointers about being on stage under bright lights.  She told us, “even though we can’t see the audience they can see us…so if you pick your nose, someone will see it!”

The Grinch who stole the woman’s liberation movement.

Women beware if you hire Gloria Allred as your attorney she will portray you as the helpless victim.  So, women, think twice before you hire Ms. Allred as you will be abandoning the feminist movement and joining Ms. Allred’s Special Victims Unit.

Traffic Sign In the Oval Office

Mr. President when did you find the time to sit down and write a book?

I know that it is a children’s book only a few dozen pages and illustrated, but in these times when the country is struggling with massive unemployment, a scary weak economy, rising health costs, rising education costs, not to mention a war half way around the world still claiming the lives of our sons and daughters couldn’t you have waited until you finished your job before you retired to the typewriter?

Please turn around and look out your window.

If I were Paris Hilton’s attorney…

Las Vegas promises “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.”  Accompanying this promise are images of people partying.

Paris Hilton takes them up on the invitation.  She goes to Vegas to party.  She parties there.  While partying in Vegas, local police suspect that she is partying and stops the car in which she is a passenger.  They find out that indeed she was partying and they arrest her for partying.  I call that ENTRAPMENT.